Alice Miller, the Einstein of Abuse

It has happened to most of us, and she, the Queen Goddess of abuse (in my opinion), explains the problem better than Shakespeare, Proust, or Joyce ever could, in her genius book, “The Drama of the Gifted Child” (Basic Books, NY, 1997).

Originally a Jungian analyst (and a great artist as well), defines it as simply as Einstein’s formula, as she proclaims that every normal child is born “gifted, genius-like,” but the acclimatization to society in the form of parenting, education, and the media, represses that genius and the reason why so many people live in quiet desperation from not fulfilling their potential in life. Is this the reason why psychologist Abraham Maslow, in searching for self-actualized people, found that they were only 3% of the population? Who knows? Who could say?

I know this about myself! It took me 50 years of searching, learning, failing, going down dead-ends, giving up, hurting myself and many others (which I am deeply ashamed of). Then after being a teacher of children with disabilities and supervisor of early childhood programs for 12 years, as well as receiving the New York City Big Brother of the Year Award, and writing my first book "Successful Children", I decided to leave education completely. It was the overwhelming bureaucracy of the NYC education department that drove my decision.

I worked in corporate America for four different miserable managers until I started my own sales and marketing corporation and published “We Magazine,” a lifestyle consumer magazine for people with disabilities.

As an entrepreneur, a published advocate for the unfortunate, a non-believer, an egoist, and finally with the help of the Holy Spirit and never giving up, I have come to know one golden thread of truth (largely from Alice Miller), that the only sin is the taking for granted, and all other sins stem from this first black domino, and that the only necessary prayer is “Thank You.”

And guess what, my friend, most therapists and book critics have never heard of Alice Miller. But you and I have! Hip, Hip, Hooray!

Read all her books and you will learn where so much crime and war come about from the abuse of children, either sexually, socially, or spiritually. And, when individuals are abused as children, it stays with them into their adulthood and projects their unconscious pain onto themselves and others. Hitler projected his pain onto the entire world and Mao, the Dictator of China, projected his personal pain and hate onto his own population.

Each of us are led through life by way of our ego or our spirit, a choice that comes from our free will. An ego will always eventually cause havoc and pain, whereas our spiritual guide makes life for us so much easier. Ego is always destructive, whereas spirit always includes a healing, joyful experience.

Which do you choose?

SWEET ANGEL

Be careful sweet angel I implore thee, as you find your way along your journey, as you search for what you need to find, be careful sweet angel for you were born amidst a suffering world that long ago denied its very own pain.

Hydras of contempt were conceived from this denial, a fear of all things mysterious was born, an eruption of projection grew in powerful circles, and the likes of you and those like you, so different in your spontaneity and joy, became inconsequential to their pronouncements.

A darkness intruded with few taking note, wings like yours cursed their routines, your insight made them look upon themselves, their reactions drew dire consequences until even the fundamental ideas you hold sacred were boxed within vaults hidden well beneath the surface.

Be aware of your limitations here for you cannot compete with the bottom tier where smiles and handshakes of sand change with expedient waves, political correctness is the only norm, and the value is the value of winning at any cost.

Such heaviness and possessions impede upon the bliss within your heart, few can hear the melody of your voice, the golden keys you hold cannot unlock the chains of an archaic testament and a fearful exactitude.

Be careful sweet angel I implore thee, for here past and future deny present, confusion is everywhere, the Pharaohs of Egypt who abhorred change still reign, within these vacuums you cannot fly, and the falcon and falconers stand ready and armed to imprison your glory.